So today marks 4 weeks in my new life as a vagabond. I have learned many things. Life is simpler in a small space.  Kind of freeing actually.  You have to be at a point in your life where you are ready to let go of all the clutter to make it work. I spent the summer cleaning closets and letting go. If it stayed in my house I had to have enough of an emotional attachment to make it worth packing. I tried to give my kids the things I thought they would appreciate or had developed their own emotional attachment to. The rest went to friends in our neighborhood or to Deseret Industries. This way my kids won't have to do it after I am gone. (Believe me boys you will thank me later).

I am grateful for my eternal companion and best friend who is sharing this journey with me. We made this plan 20 years ago and have spent that time saving for this adventure. We "saved until we were living paycheck to paycheck" for a long time.  But it was ok because we had a goal in mind.  I spent most of our married lives budgeting and could squeeze a dollar til it cried. We are back to that point now as we try to figure out how to live on my salary working 3 days a week and Mike's monthly draw from his retirement. A friend of mine told me a few years ago that it was hard to spend the money you had saved for your whole adult life and she was right.  But we are blessed to have a wise financial planner who managed our savings very well and thanks to Bob Aamodt we are doing fine. He reassures me and is a voice of reason when I have sleepless nights wondering how we will work this all out.

Mike is great to pick up the slack while I work. He does the laundry (and folds it), helps cook meals and does the dishes. We are compromising on things like TV and radio stations. See Mike likes the old time country music (the kind that makes your ears bleed) and I like more modern stuff. But we are working it out and widening our musical horizons. We have a satellite dish but only get satellite reception on one tv (yes the mobile mansion has two) so when we can't antenna reception on the other tv I have watched more sports and he has watched those mushy Hallmark movies (and even said "that wasn't too bad").

Mike is an awesome trip planner and pulls this beast down the road like nothing was there.  I have driven once since we left (and it ended up being in the dark and during a rain storm).  Afterwards, I was even more grateful that I don't have to drive.  I have pulled our trailer and can do it in a pinch but it isn't my most favorite way to pass the time.

I am learning new tricks with technology (and how to use the cloud) so down the road I hope to be able to share pictures of the things we have experienced and the sites we have seen. We have truly been blessed to live in a beautiful country and I am excited to be able to experience new Inge and see new places.  Stay tuned for more as we are #ontheroadtoanywherewewant.

It's been an "Aha" moment day

So I have been at my new job for 10 months. I have to learn this new program to compute tax and net operating loss and non-refundable credit carryovers. I have been playing with this program for about 8 months. So today I start computing on a new client (following behind someone elses work-again) and all of a sudden I see it. There they are those pesky little carry overs and I can back into why all of the carry over isn't used on this taxable year. So it isn't really true, YOU CAN TRACH AN OLD DOG NEW TRICKS. Sit up and fetch are next.

Sick Day

This morning I woke up with a migraine. I haven't had one for a long time. I called in sick and tried to go back to sleep. No such luck. I don't know why when you can sleep in I can't but on work days I have a hard time dragging my fanny out of bed. It did feel good to spend a day relaxing. I haven't done this for a long time. I guess it was time for a mental health day.

The Cable Guy

Yesterday the cable guy came because the digital box in our room wasn't working. He was so thorough, he changed the cable wire in our toom and fixed it so the internet is smoking hot its so fast. The tv in the family room gets an unbelievably clear picture. It isn't often these days that you get such great customer service especially from the cable company.

Random thoughts on Summer Days

This day started out great. Sitting on the deck sipping a beverage. Then on to laundry (which I hung on the line outside) sprayed the weeds in the grass. Put down bug killer and cleaned my shower. Man am I glad I don't work on Fridays (wait I just don't get paid for the work I do on Fridays).

Mike has been working out of town all week. I am sitting in the shade waiting to take him home. Its funny how after sleeping next to someone for 30+ years you can't sleep when they aren't there. I have really missed him. Next week he is off to Monticello for the week. He has lost so much weight this year I have got to get the boy some new pants. He is dragging them around half way down his legs.

I went to the doctor today for my check up. Things weren't as bad as I thpught with my blood sugar but everything else is a different matter. Checking on my heart to make sure my shortness of breath isn't anything serious. Also checking on my gallbladder to see if that is why my stomache is acting up. Oh and my knee, checking on the arthritis in it. Trying to decide if it is time for a new one. I am almost hoping so. It has started to hurt quite badly. I feel like I am falling apart. But life is really looking up.

We bought a new truck last week. Took our old one in for its 2nd oil change (it was 3 years old) and a new pickup followed up home instead. It is pretty awesome and runs like a cut cat. That Mikey is so spoiled.

Happy Mothers Day to me

May 8, 2011 really was not the best Mothers Day I have ever had. May 8 is my dads birthday. He has been gone for 16 years now and I still miss him terribly. This was also the first Mother's Day when I didn't have a mother to honor. We lost our Mom on November 17, 2010. Then to dredge it all up again, we had a graveside service for her on the 23rd of April to inter her ashes. It was like losing her all over again. Even though I lost a Mom who had the capability to guide me 5 years ago when she had her stroke, she never lost the capability to love.

So the last of the one two punch for Mothers Day was when the boys decided to have not one but two squabbles. I am so ready for them to out grow this. It doesn't matter who works the longest hours or the hardest. And they need to not take things so personal. If they are going to tease, then they are going to have to take it when someone teases back.

The high point of the day are the wonderful women who love my sons. I hope my boys realize how blessed they are. The thing that gets me the most is that they would go to the mat for each other but then they also say the most hurtful things to each other. I really tried hard to teach them manners. They are getting along better but it just breaks my heart. I guess now I know why my Mom got so upset when I would fight with my sisters. After a while we got to the point where we would hide the arguments from her.

So anyway, I do need to be thankful for the gift I got from mike and Dave. At my advanced age, I am old enough for yard art. They gave me the cutest frog and turtle for my planter box in the front yard. Next it will be pink flamingos. Those will need to go in the back yard because I can see those works of art going missing.

So anyway for better or worse, Mothers Day 2011 is in the record books and life as we know it goes on.

Hurray, The Wicked Witch is Dead

I am not generally the type of person to celebrate the death of anyone but I have to say I am so proud of our military and glad that Osama Bin Laden wasn't taken alive. This one person has been responsible for manipulating the lives of many to his nefarious ways and endinng the lives if so many innocent people. I am, however, glad that he was accorded a decent burial according to Muslin customs. That one action shows the difference between people of the United States of America and the terroristic groups found in the world. Even though this guy was one of the worst specimins of humanity, we still treated his body with the respect it deserved as he was laid in his final resting space. I am glad that the body wasn't buried on land to later become a shrine by the terrorists. All that is left now is for Osama to make is peace and be judged by his God.

Again, I have to say a big thank you to the military that sticks with it no matter



how long it takes. And a second thank you to the families who go without their loved ones so we may sleep a little safer at night.

Sweet Memories

Saturday is the graveside service for my mother. She passed away on November 17, 2010 from the side effects of fighting everything they could throw at her for over 5 years. My Mom was one tough cookie. She had a stroke, then heart surgery, then fell and broke her leg (this after having had two new hips about 10 years ago). They diagnosed her with bladder cancer and I think she was finally glad to go.

My Dad passed away 16 years ago from Lou Gherigs Disease (ALS) that is one of the suckiest diseases that a body can have. Anyway, my Mom has spent 16 years waiting until we were strong enough to live without her so she could join her soulmate.

Anyway, the day of her funeral, there was a terrible snowstorm. She had expressed a wish to be cremated so waiting for the burial wasn't a real problem. I was good with it until about 3 weeks ago when it was time to start getting the arrangements for the graveside service completed. Turns out, I am not as over my grief as I thought I was. I think the hardest thing about losing her is how fast it happened. She went in the hospital on a Friday morning and passed away the following Wednesday morning. I had worked on Tuesday and Mike and I went down to Salt Lake to visit her after work. When I got there, I noticed the signs (of how close to death she really was) and told Mike I didn't think I had better leave. If I had not had the experience of ushering my Dad and my mother-in-law through the veil, I don't think I would have realized it was happening that fast.

I sat with her as she struggled to stay with us, and wished I could make it easier. I know in my heart she was not alone when she left that room for the last time, I just wish I could have given my Dad a hug and kiss one last time.

So now, I am once again gathering my thoughts to share at a service celebrating her life. I can't find the file that contains the talk I wrote for her funeral so I guess I am starting from scratch. Some one sent me an e-mail titled 25 things my Mother taught me. It was as if I could here her voice saying the things on the page. She had been on my mind so much I have dreamed about her. How wonderful to hear her voice, I just wish I could put my arms around her and tell her I wish I had been more patient with her and taken every opportunity I could to visit her.

I appease my hurt by knowing in my heart that she is in a better place with my father once again. She never liked being on her own and will be so glad to have his support and arms to hold her.

I love you so much Mom and Dad. I can't wait to see you again.

Parenting is Not For Wimps

I used to hate it when my kids would be up all night knowing that I still had to be at work the next morning at 6 a.m. regardless. The little darlings could have a nap at the babysitters but Mom didn't get that luxury. Then there was 12 years of missed assignments and "I don't know" hiding the homework that did get done. Fights on the playground, fights on the bus, calls from the attendance office, ear infections, colds, tonsilectomies, broken bones, stitches and the list goes on and on.

I would take it all back and live through it again. It is much easier than being a parent and watching your kids go through things you can't fix. I pray a lot but feel so helpless as I watch my boys endure challenges that I know will turn them into men and prepare them for their own turn at parenting, but boy it is hard. I try not to be a "helicopter" parent but a Mom worries don't you know.

I just try to make sure my boys know how much I love them and that I am proud of them when they make good decisions. And when they make mistakes I love them anyway and stand by them as they suffer the consequences of their actions.

Just saying though, it was much easier when I could put a "Bob the Builder" bandaid on it and kiss the booboo better.

Baby Boys

Twenty nine years ago today, I was pretty much miserable. Then I received one of the two best gifts in my life. Brandon will turn 29 tomorrow. After a rocky start, and 8 long days in the NICU at McKay Dee hospital, we brought our precious baby home and life as we knew it changed forever. So here he is 29 and starting a new year and a new page in his life. He and his wife Becca moved to West Valley to be closer to family. It was wonderful to have them come for dinner tonight and not have to rush because of an 8 hour drive home. Plus it will give him and his brother a chance to interact together as adults.

I am so proud of my son who is not afraid to step out of his comfort zone and make a new start. He is so blessed to have a partner who supports him and uplifts him and helps him explore all the possibilities that exist for the two of them. So as I sign off I just need to say Happy Birthday Brandon. I love you and our lives are so blessed because you chose to be a part of it.

Little Boys and Their Toys

Tonight was the Pine Wood Derby for our Cub Scout troops. Mike was a judge and said you couldn't go to a race without the proper attire. So with his Mark Martin shirt, his "Go Daddy" coat and his Kobalt Tools hat off we go. We also took his 41 year old PineWood derby car and Dave's car. Brandon's car is nailed in his shadow box so it got to stay home.

Talk about nerve racking. Some of those cars ran so close together it was very hard to tell who won the heats. After all the real kid's cars had all run, I asked the guy who owned the track if we could run my cars. This guy had all these fancy cars in metal boxes for the boys to look at. I was kind of embarassed to take our family's plain cars up there but did it anyway. Mikes car is about 41 years old (circa 1968 we think). When he saw this very plain old car, he was very excited and offered to BUY IT. I was flabbergasted. He said he had been looking at DI and every where for some to show the kids the older styles. You should have seen the look on his face when I said we had another one at home just like it.

So to make a long story short, we declined the offer to sell them but said we would let him borrow them if he wanted. I thought it might be fun for each of my boys to have one of their Dads cars along with theirs to shoe their kids. Maybe someday we can be a three generation PineWood Derby car family.

It's kind of funny how (when you are an orphan) how much family and generational stuff means. I am so greatful to our Moms who saved silly stuff like our report cards etc.. that will be fun to show our grandkids some day. I will even be able to explain to them what wonderful people their Great Grandparents were and how lucky we were to have them. It pleases me to think that somewhere in the spirit world, maybe even now, they are guiding and helping each other while we down here desperately miss one generation while waiting patiently for the next generation to bless us with their presence.

This is my blog and these are my feelingss

So it has come to my attention that some one has taken offense to a comment I posted on my blog yesterday. I never intentionally set out to hurt anyones feelings but the fact of the matter is this is my blog and these are my thoughts and feelings. The sad thing about the events of yesterday is someone made that same comment when I commented on a post she had made.

I am terribly sorry that someone has taken offense to my comments. I wasnt even thinking about her when I made the comment that she found offensive. So life will go on and I will continue to act in a manner that ultimately means "do no harm" and if anyone takes offense but chooses not to talk to me about it, then I guess that is something they will have to deal with on their own.

Life is Great

I have been reading my oldest son's blog. I have to admit he has a real way with words. My goal for this year is to be more consistent in updating my blog. I am home today (day two of sick leave) with the flu. I am feeling better but have had the most awful hiccups all afternoon. Add that to a sore throat and not being able to catch my breath and I have been pretty much miserable.

So Brandon and Becca have celebrated their 1st anniversary. They seem content. Things are not perfect but they seem to have open communication (with each other--not their parents, which is how it should be). I am so happy that they seem to be resolving things and getting on with life.

Dave has been dating a very nice girl for about 4 months now. She has a very positive attitude and is working on her schooling. I am sitting quietly (very hard for me) and watching how this relationship develops. Dave seems to be doing well at work also. It is reassuring to see positive things finally happening for this kid. He will probably always struggle with certain aspects of his life. but he deserves good things. He has the biggest heart and the most giving nature and is growing up so well.

Blessings I have received

I am continuing the message from my last post. I am truly blessed in my life with a great family and good friends. I have been given the opportunity to accept a new position with an accounting firm here where I live. This is after 24 and 1/2 years with the government, which has been very good to me. It is great money, great benefits and I can still retire in 6 years. Mike has commented that he will not mind being a kept man, I am thinking of buying him a new apron.

I think that this opportunity is my blessing for the years of sacrifice I have made for my family. Sacrifices made without begrudgement because I know what is important in my life. Whether it was downgrading so I could help my kids succeed in school, the time I lost from life and work helping my family deal with my father's illness and death, the time missed from work and life as we dealt with my father-in-laws illness and death and the time I spent taking care of my beloved mother-in-law as she battled cancer.

I am excited about my new experiences that I will enjoy. I admit, it's terrifying to make a change at my age, and I am not the bravest person in the world. I have spent the whole day having a panic attack just wondering if the rug would be pulled out from under my feet and the opportunity would just be a joke. I have made a habit in life of not expecting too much because the less you expect the easier it is when you don't get anything. Less disappointment that way.

The best thing about the whole experience is they came looking for me. All along I would say if your looking for ........., I am not your girl, whether it was lots of hours, the education I am lacking and not interested in seeking. I also was not to interested because originally the offer would have required me to give up about 1/2 of the vacation days I now accrue in a year. And I wasn't willing to do that. I wasn't trying to be difficult, or hold out for more money. I already make more money that I ever thought I would in my life, I have a great job with a great company working for a great boss. Good hours (pretty flexible) and the ability to work from home. How great could it get??????

Well along came the offer that includes the same vacation days practically, flexibility of work hours, the ability to work from home if I need to and a great office to work in. I know quite a few of the employees there so it won't be like going to a strange office. How good can it get. Well I will have to keep you posted because the sky's the limit.

Happy Days.

Sisters

I have to say, I am the luckiest girl in the world. I have two awesome sisters. They are my friends and it's funny but even though we have the same parents, we are soooooooo different.

Katie for example, the oldest, is very introverted and keeps to herself. But if you need anything, she is the "go to" girl. She also happens to be married to my husbands best college buddy. I think this year is probably their 25th wedding anniversary.

Georgina (George to those of us who know her and love her) is the baby of the family but what a little mother she turned out to be. She and her family, Bruce and Cody, care for our mother who had a stroke 5 years ago. And you couldn't find better care givers. She has been married to Bruce for 21 years.

Mike and I have been married 30 years and I am the steam roller of the family. I am a take charge kind of person which I am sure drives them both nuts because I see a problem and I feel the need to stick my nose in and fix it. But they haven't kicked me out of the family yet so I am keeping on keeping on.

This picture was taken at my son's wedding in February. And the guest of honor is the woman who started it all, our Mom. She has aged a little lately in the last few years, she will be 78 this fall in August and is kind of like the energizer bunny, she just keeps on keeping on. She had a stroke in 2005, then a quadruple (or something like that) bypass and last September she fell and broke her leg. She is a strong woman and has been an example to us girls of how to be and how to raise a strong family. Between the 3 of us, we have given her 5 grandsons who she loves very much. She always loves to see them come visit and always has a big grin for them. They run in age from 28 to 18. And she loves her new grand-daughter in-law very much. I think mostly for how happy her grandson is.

Lifes funny twists and turns

I can't believe it's been so long since I have had anything important to write about. Sometimes, I wonder what I have done to deserve the blessings I have received in my life. When I was young and knew it all, my Dad and I were constantly at loggerheads (does anyone besides me know what that means, if so you are probably old like me). Anyway, because I knew it all, I totally blew off high school but I graduated. Then I figured I knew it all and college wasn't going to teach me anything. Then when I was 25, with two kids and bills we couldn't pay, I went to job service for help finding a job that paid more than JCPenney. But the kind lady at Job Service informed me that they couldn't help me, I had no marketable skills. Looks like I had been hoisted on my on pertard (another one of those old words). Anyway, I made the decision then and there that I had screwed myself, it was up to me to make something of myself. Going to college, now that I realized how important it was, was not an option because I had two kids to raise and a husband who was gone all the time.

In my job at JCPenney, I had done a little bit of filing, nothing noteworthy, but it counted. So I got a job at IRS and that little bit of filing got me in the door as a GS3 rather than a GS2. In the last 24 years at IRS, I have hopscotched my way around the service, working in just about anything, but picking up those little skills along the way. My guardian angel has been watching over me all these years, putting me in the right place to learn skills that I had no idea what I would do with them down the road. I guess being willing to do any job put in front of you pays off in the end.

Now I am not the most intelligent person on earth, and the theory of accounting and algebra is just beyond me. I have taken just enough accounting classes to know that I hate working with numbers, and I can work an algabraic formula, as long as there isn't an X or a Y in there. But go figure, I work for the IRS. Anyway, I have no idea why things seem to work out for me but I am doing things I never thought I would be able to, and making more money than I ever thought I would.

It frustrates me that my kids don't understand how important college is. I don't want them to have to make the same stupid choices I did and learn their lessons from the school of hard knocks. But considering who they have for a mother, I can see that they will do things the hard way the same way I did. All I can do is pray for them and hope that they have the same blessings in their life that I have.

Welcome Spring

We finally made it. I think spring has sprung. I got the yard cleaned up from winter, pulled the planters out from under the deck and got the new mulch spread in the planter out front. Trimmed the roses (man do I miss Virginia, she used to do that loathsome chore), sprayed the weeds in the garden, mowed up three months of dog #@!%$# (trying to remember why I like them so much--oh yeah they're cute) and got rid of the tiller. All that's left is to dispose of a few old yard machines that no longer work.

Then I need to decide what flowers I want to go into my planters. By the way, they multiplied under the deck this winter (has to be it because it seems like more came out than I put under there).

Also, got the trailer home and the basement storage put back together, fixed the light switch, put all the stuff back in the basement storage and now all that's left to do is wash the bird !@#$#@! off.

I am so glad that I get to work tomorrow, I really need the rest. What a weekend.

Good Times, Good Friends and RAIN

So once again, for about the 20th year, Mike and I spent Easter vacation with our best friends Jeff and Jolene. Now Jeff is about a close as Mikes "brotha from anotha motha" as you can get. It's weird how they think the same thoughts and can finish each other's sentences. But I digress.

The title of this little ditty should actually be Good Friends, Long Drives, Rigorous Hikes (that I survived by the way) and Road Side Surgery.

We spent the weekend in Windsor California, a nice little slice of heaven north of San Fransciso. Left the snow for rain and came back home to snow. While we were there, we saw tons of "happy cows" from California, the ocean and some beautiful redwoods. Then off to San Franscisco for the day to ride the cable cars and eat seafood.

While in the Armstrong State Park, we decided to hike. Unfortunately, I let everyone else pick the hike. We went straight up for about 10 miles, then straight down the same amount. But they saw some wonderful scenery. Me, I was too busy trying to catch my breath and make sure I didn't trip over something to see anything. It had rained the day before so everything was fresh. The problem I have is I spend too much time jockeying a chair and not enough time outside hiking. But unfortunately Mike likes the $$ I make too much to let me trade in my pencil for hiking boots. Top it off with 70 year old knees in a 50 year old body and it's lucky I didn't have a heart attack and have to be life flighted off the hill. But I made it, whining all the way.

Then it was off to some of the most beautiful ocean scenery you have ever imagined. What an inspiration to see all that God has put here for us to enjoy. After we drove the coast we were driving back to the condo on this little two lane road, in the middle of no where, when Jeff notices he has a tick buried about halfway into his arm. Even after he made such fun of me on the hike, I still took pity on him and provided the instruments for a little road side tick extraction. And doctors think they need sterile operating rooms and razor sharp instruments. Funny what you can do with matches from Joe and Angie's wedding (10 years ago almost), the file from a pair of fingernail clippers (luckily TSA didn't confiscate the dangerous instrument) and a little bit of hand sanitizer. But we burned his little butt (the ticks, not Jeff's) pulled him out, cleaned it off and went on our way.

I have to say that I am grateful to have very special people in my life. I have never had a brother but Jeff is as close at it could come the way he gives me a hard time. They are a wonderful couple and are very easy to travel with. No drama, enjoys quiet time and a lot of humor. Jolene is very gullible and keeps falling for Mike's pranks. I keep telling her that if his lips are moving, he lying. But she keeps getting sucked in. Oh well, if Mike's giving her a hard time, I'm safe.

The Wedding

Well, it's been a month since Brandon and Becca were married. I have been looking at the wedding pictures (all 1014 of them) and they are wonderful. Brandon looked so relaxed and Becca, when that girl laughs, she laughs with her whole body. I think the thing that struck me the most, looking back, is how relaxed everyone was, no stress, no drama, just good friends and good fun. The smile on Brandon's face reminded me of when he was little and I haven't seen that look in about 20 years. Thank you Becca for putting that look back on his face, I could never repay you for that.

My Mom was the Matriarch of the affair. She was so proud to see him married. It was good to have my whole family together, I just with Katie's kids had been there. They were the only ones missing. It was a small intimate affair with good food, good friends and great memories.

Life goes on.

I can't believe it's been so long since I updated my blog. Since my last post, Mike and I (with some help from our sons and some friends) have completely gutted and remodeled the bathroom in our house. Includes a new jacuzzi tub, new tile on the walls and floor, new cabinet over the toilet and a new sink and counter top. I am so excited it has turned out wonderful. But I have to say, it was a lot easier 26years ago when we were doing the tile in there for the first time. It sucks to get old and worn out. One thing I do have to say is I have a lot of respect for my mother and father in law. When we built this house, they spent a lot of time here during the summer helping us do the lawn etc. They were out there sweating in the sun all day while Mike and I worked and then still helped in the evening when we got home. I don't know how they did it without whining all the time like I have been doing.

I will try to have Dave help me put some pictures here so you can enjoy it also (the bathroom). Have a great day. And Happy Spring.